今天小编要为大家介绍的是一篇6分雅思作文，6分这样的分数不算高，但也不算低。还是有上升空间的，如果想要突破6分该怎么做，接下来让我们来看看文章的分析!
雅思6分作文例文：
Some people think that a sense of competition in children should be encouraged. Others believe that children who are taught to co-operate rather than compete become more useful adults. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.
Nowadays, purpose of education being changed in Korea. There are some people who think that competition in children should be made, also others believe that children who are taught to co-operate as well as become more useful adults. There are advantages and disadvantages for both of the arguments.
To begin with, what is good if a sense of competition in children is made? They could develop themselves more and more as they learn and study a lot to win from the competition. To prove this, in Korea, it is popular- even common now- to have a tutor who come to student’s house to teach extra pieces of study with paying a lot of money. They learn faster than what they learn at school. Furthermore, during the vocations, students study abroad to learn English for a month instead of revise school work. If they have experiments such as study abroad, it is one of the greatest plus point to go to the famous well-known high school. Moreover, there are four big school exam and two national examinations to test students’ level of studies. Generally, only the highest 40% can go to the good quality highschools and colleges children learn as much as they can, to win the competition to obtain good quality schools.
On the other hand, as they are busy to enter the schools and study individually with their own tutors, there are problems. They become selfish. They become careless and don’t help others a lot if it is about studies. There will be no co-operations for them. Then, why are there companies for many people to work in? each of them are clever, however, there are weak parts and strong parts for each person. To co-operate is to improve this part. People talk and listen to what others thinking of and learn. That could also be a great opportunity to learn instead of learning alone with one teacher.
In conclusion, I strongly agree with that children should be taught to co-operate rather than compete. Nobody is perfect. People learn together, work together to develop each other. therefore, I want parents and teachers to educate children concentrating on co-operation, not compete and ranking them.
雅思6分作文问题分析：
从论证大主题的角度来说，这一篇的最后的收尾是co-operation更重要的成立的，但是这位考生在文字数量分配上缺乏规划，分配给competition的文字明显多于给co-operation的，这样就有了一个非常合情合理的借口扣分，实在是遗憾啊!
写作建议：如果你更认同那个观点，那就在这个观点上多写点吧。
以上就是有关“雅思6分作文”的相关内容，小编预祝大家能够早日通过考试，更多精彩资讯尽在朗阁教育官网!
.png)
